if i go stark-raving mad


will this blog be used to analyze me? I wonder. I write pretty honestly, or, as Skrud so nicely put it once in an email:

you surprise me with how much you’ll actually *reveal* on your blog. And I *do* wish I could be as open as that with the complete void of “teh intarnets”

My lack of brain-to-mouth filter leads to what one can only describe as linguistic regurgitation, but i realize the possibility of using this collection of my thoughts and ramblings to analyze my problems is huge. In fact, it’s why i do it in the first place – asides of course, from the obvious trying to improve my writing style through sheer frequency.

Okay…onwards to the actual point. After the shooting yesterday, the media has decided to find out about the shooter by accessing some of the stuff he posted online (you can access the CBC online article here):

In his profile on vampirefreaks.com, a website devoted to Goth culture, Gill called himself “Trench,” and wrote: “You will come to know him as the Angel of Death.”
“Work sucks … School sucks … Life sucks … What else can I say?” he wrote. “Metal and Goth kick ass. Life is like a video game, you gotta die sometime.”

Now, quite obviously the guy was disturbed…i mean, he went on a shooting rampage, but this isn’t the first time that someone’s livejournal, wordpress, xanga or whatever other interface writings have been used to corroborate the media’s depiction of a killer. I wonder about this as a techinque…i can definitely see the sensational appeal, but how much does the average individual’s blog reflect their true thoughts? i revel in hyperbole on a daily basis. i love extremes and shocking statements…if i HAD thrown myself in front of the metro instead of chopping off an insane amount of hair, would someone have gone through this blog to validate my decision? That person would never have found the reason…because i only blog about stuff AFTER i have started to articulate it as a problem and i only do outrageous things when problems are still undefinable in an attempt to define them. I guess i have nothing to worry about. And there is no question that the pictures of the shooter brandishing his semi-automatic on this website are creepy, but does everyone who has a picture of himself/herself brandishing a weapon have the same issues? Definitely not. I worry that someone is going to make that leap. I worry a lot.

Well, i have homework to do before heading in to class. I better get cracking or i am just going to fall even further behind. There is nothing like moving to take up lots of time.


One thought on “if i go stark-raving mad

  1. Pingback: skrud.net : Random Acts Of Violence - Continued

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